3 Campy Horror Films to Watch When Sick

Whenever I was little my go-to whenever I was sick was Gatorade, saltines, chamomile tea, Archie Comics, and campy horror movies. My parents would always rent me some new campy horrors and buy me new comics, and I’d always feel marginally better afterward. So, if you ever find yourself stuck in bed and need a way to kill a few horrors with some campy horrors, don’t worry! I have you covered.

PSYCHO GOREMAN

Intergalactic assassins converge on a small town after two siblings unwittingly resurrect an ancient alien overlord.

EVIL DEAD 2: DEAD BY DAWN

The second of three films in the Evil Dead series is part horror, part comedy, with Ash Williams (Bruce Campbell) once again battling horrifying demons at a secluded cabin in the woods. After discovering an audiotape left by a college professor that contains voices reading from the Book of the Dead, Ash’s girlfriend Linda (Denise Bixler) becomes possessed by evil spirits that are awakened by the voices on the tape. Ash soon discovers there is no escaping the woods.

AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN PARIS

A group of carousing American tourists is taking in the cultural landmarks of Paris when a chance encounter results in sightseer Andy McDermott (Tom Everett Scott) saving the life of Parisian Serafine Pigot (Julie Delpy). While on a date at a nightclub with Serafine, Andy is suddenly attacked and bitten by a werewolf. The next day he discovers that Serafine is also a lycanthrope, and that he is beginning his own grueling, hirsute transformation into one of the fanged beasts.

WHAT ARE YOUR FAVE CAMPY HORRORS?

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Film Review: Last Night In Soho

I’ve enjoyed Edgar Wright films ever since he began with Shaun of the Dead. Now, Last Night In Soho doesn’t have time to be witty or funny as it’s drenched in dread and blood.

This film has everything I personally love, London, 60’s music, and a badass chick in the form of Sandy (Anya Taylor-Joy). But the true breakout star of this movie is shy Eloise played by the superb Thomasin McKenzie. Eloise has fashion designer aspirations and when she’s over the moon when she’s accepted to a fashion school in London. Only she finds out real quick that London isn’t as amazing as it seems when she fails to fit in with her college peers and seeks refuge in Soho where she rents a room from Miss Collins.

The moment Eloise enters the room, she begins to have visions of the past. Every night when she goes to sleep she mysteriously enters the world of 1960’s London and sees the night life from the eyes of aspiring singer Sandy. Initially, Eloise is smitten to enter the world she always wanted to inhabit. In her waking life, she tries to emulate Sandy, by her looks, haircolour, and speech. But she soon discovers that all the glitz and glamour isn’t as it seems especially when she witnesses a brutal murder. Soon, she’s being haunted even in her waking life, and the fine line between reality and fiction weave in a terrible fever dream that comes to a brutal head in the final act.

This film will leave you speechless in the final act but also with a smirk.

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5 Horror Movies I’m Looking Forward to in 2022

ORPHAN: FIRST KILL

I really enjoyed the first film in this franchise and am curious about the interesting plot in the sequel:

Leena, a murderous sociopath who looks like a child due to a medical condition, escapes from an Estonian psychiatric facility. Leena impersonates the missing daughter of a wealthy family but becomes pitted against a determined mother.

DARK HARVEST

A legendary monster called October Boy terrorizes residents in a small Midwestern town when he rises from the cornfields every Halloween with his butcher knife and makes his way toward those who are brave enough to confront him.

NOPE

Not much is known about this film plot-wise, but it’s Jordan Peele and there’s a mushroom cloud in the sky, so I don’t know if it’ll be a horror movie inspired by atomic bombs?

DON’T WORRY DARLING

A 1950’s housewife living with her husband in a utopian experimental community begins to worry that his glamorous company may be hiding disturbing secrets.

HATCHING

A young gymnast who tries desperately to please her demanding mother discovers a strange egg. She hides it and keeps it warm, but when it hatches, what emerges shocks them all.

WHAT ARE SOME HORROR FILMS YOU’RE LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS YEAR? LET ME KNOW!

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Film Review: The Advent Calendar

This film from writer-director Patrick Rideremont is a fever dream of a modern fairytale of storts. Eva (Eugenie Derouand) is a former ballet dancer who is now stuck in a wheelchair after a car accident (caused by her best friend). Said best friend gives her an ancient Advent Calendar for her birthday and this is when the Faustian thrills begin.

From love potions, voodoo, and trippy hallucinations, this horror has it all. The rules of the Advent Calendar are quite simple, eat all of the candy in the calendar or you die, follow all of the calendar’s rules or you will die, and don’t you dare throw the calendar away or you will die.

The calendar seemingly seems to give Eva everything she desires, but receiving these “gifts” means that she must be willing to sacrifice something as well. As the days go on, the gifts she reaps are bigger and the sacrifices begin to get much more personal each time.

Reading some reviews of the film, I know some didn’t like the idea that a disabled character would go above and beyond morality to try to regain the use of her legs. And I get why that would be problematic. I think the script should’ve shown the real reason why Eva was obsessed with regaining the use of her legs so that she could dance again (ballet was her life). Without showing the audience how important ballet was to her, her drive to be “normal” feels like a form of ableism.

Overall, the film has beautiful cinematography and the actual Advent Calendar prop is something that all horror enthusiasts would love to have (maybe without the Faustian curse though).

You can check out the film on Shudder.

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Top 3 Christmas Horror Movies

I don’t know why I always find that Christmas time can inspire the creepiest films. Maybe it’s because of the cold or the sinking feeling of isolation that becomes far more acute during the winter months, but horror movies that are set during the Christmas holiday are that much creepier, and here are my top three.

BLACK CHRISTMAS (1974)

As winter break begins, a group of sorority sisters, including Jess (Olivia Hussey) and the often inebriated Barb (Margot Kidder), begin to receive anonymous, lascivious phone calls. Initially, Barb eggs the caller on, but stops when he responds threateningly. Soon, Barb’s friend Claire (Lynne Griffin) goes missing from the sorority house, and a local adolescent girl is murdered, leading the girls to suspect a serial killer is on the loose. But no one realizes just how near the culprit is.

THE LODGE (2019)

During a family retreat to a remote winter cabin over the holidays, the father is forced to abruptly depart for work, leaving his two children in the care of his new girlfriend, Grace. Isolated and alone, a blizzard traps them inside the lodge as terrifying events summon specters from Grace’s dark past.

SILENT NIGHT DEADLY NIGHT (1984)

An orphan raised by nuns (Lilyan Chauvin, Gilmer McCormick) grows up to be a killer toy-store Santa Claus.

What are some of your fave Christmas horror movies?

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My Favourite Horror Movie Trope: Creepy Dolls

When it comes to horror tropes, creepy dolls is hands down my absolute favourite. I can’t really explain why, other than the fact that I’ve always been a huge lover and collector of dolls, so the idea that said dolls could actually come to life has equally thrilled and horrified me. Considering that my first ever published work was for a school anthology when I was nine entitled, “Little Friends,” where the protagonists doll comes to life and guides the protagonist towards a haunted forest with a witch pretty much tells you all there is to know about child-me (I’m actually very surprised my school actually published a story that had both a witch AND a killer doll all in one but hey, guess the principal was a horror fan). Having said that, here are my absolute must-see creepy dolls horror movies.

DOLLS

A dysfunctional family of three stop by a mansion during a storm – father, stepmother, and child. The child discovers that the elderly owners are magical toy makers and have a haunted collection of dolls. If you happened to sleepover at my house between the time I was 6-12 years old, then you most definitely have seen this and I may have played pranks to amp up the scare factor, and maybe you know hate me (and dolls) forever. Sorry, not sorry.

CHILD’S PLAY

A single mother gives her son a much sought-after doll for his birthday, only to discover that it is possessed by the soul of a serial killer. There’s no way that I could have a creepy doll list without mentioning the most iconic and famous killer doll of them all, Chucky! Now, not only is Chucky uber creepy, he’s also hella funny spouting off one-liners with the comedic verve of Freddy Krueger, so obviously, I’m a huge fan of the franchise.

PUPPET MASTER

Psychics find themselves plotted against by a former colleague, who committed suicide after discovering animated, murderous puppets. This film franchise has a ton of sequels (that yes, I have seen) that take a turn for the campy, historic, and truly bizarre at some points. My favourite puppet of the group is Blade and Fangoria magazine was selling said puppets at one point when I was little but I could never get my dad to shell out $80 for a puppet (which I’m still salty about cause ya know, Blade was totally awesome).

ANNABELLE

A couple begins to experience terrifying supernatural occurences involving a vintage doll shortly after their home is invaded by satanic cultists. Everyone is familiar with Annabelle, and what sets her apart from all the other dolls in this list is that said Annabelle actually exists and is believed to be totally haunted. The Warrens kept the real Annabelle in a locked glass case and had a priest bless it once a month to weaken the evil spirits. I really loved this film so much that I ended up watching it at a theatre twice.

DEAD SILENCE

A young widower returns to his hometown to search for answers to his wife’s murder, which may be linked to the ghost of a deceased ventriloquist. Before James Wan decided to scare the shit out of people with Annabelle he decided to go for the creepy puppet and I was there for it (honestly I’m gutted that it never had a sequel).

What are some of your favourite horror tropes? Let me know!

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Film Review: Candyman (2021)

Candyman, Candyman, Candyman, Candyman…..

NOPE.

Not saying it five times cause we all know what happens next, especially if you’re a 90’s kid. But now with Nia DaCosta’s revamped spiritual sequel to the 1992 original film, a whole new generation can fear the hook. It’s no surprise that I was a huge fan of the original, and some of the old school horror fans didn’t take it well when this sequel was announced. I, instead was excited to see this franchise be resuscitated and now after viewing the film (first film I’ve seen in an actual theatre since the pandemic hit), I’m even more thrilled to see where the Candyman journey may take us in the future.

The absolute pro that this film has is that it manages to seamlessly connect the 1992 film with the current one in a way that doesn’t seem forced nor stilted. We follow the protagonist, Anthony McCoy (Yahya Abdul-Mateen II), now an adult, but in the 1992 film was saved from the fire by Helen Lyle (Virginia Madsen), unknowingly returns to his origins when he’s back to living in the former Cabrini Green only now filled with high-rise luxury apartments that he shares with art curator girlfriend.

Anthony is introduced to the Candyman legend by William Burke (Coleman Domingo) who gets him up to speed on how the legend originated (the superb use of shadow puppets is used to depict the violent backstories). As it’s true with any urban legend, details have been distorted or forgotten so we soon find out that Candyman isn’t merely Daniel Robitaille (Tony Todd) wronged painter, but that it encapsulates an array of different black men that have been wronged throughout the years that have taken up the scepter of Candyman and kept the legend alive.

My only gripe with the film is that it lacked any real feeling of dread. The body horror element added a bit of creep factor, but it’s hard to make a film about a legendary ghoul if the one you’re using isn’t as compelling, frightening, and seductive as Tony Todd’s Daniel was. In fact, the strongest scene in the film is when we’re finally graced with Tony Todd’s cameo, his commanding voice lulling the audience back into a trance that is equal parts mesmerized and scared shitless.

This is not to say though that the franchise doesn’t have room to grow, because I think it does and I honestly can’t wait for a new installment to be made.

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Film Review: We Need To Do Something

I read the novella that this movie is based on, Max Booth III’s “We Need to Do Something.” And I’ll admit that in this case, you may want to see the movie prior to reading the novella, only because the film follows the novella very closely, so the surprise factor will be gone. However, this didn’t completely spoil my viewing of the film because I was very curious to see how the filmmaker would direct certain scenes.

As we’re in full hurricane season, watching a film about a family who decides to hole themselves up in a bathroom to brace a storm is very fitting. For 90 minutes we watch the horror unfold as a very dysfunctional family have to try to stay in the same room for what seems to be days. Pat Healy plays the alcoholic father who loses his mind once he runs out of booze, Vinessa Shaw plays the mother, a Pollyanna-type figure who clearly doesn’t want to admit that bad shit is happening even when she’s soaked in blood, Sierra McCormick is the resident goth Mel who is plagued by guilt over a supposed-spell gone wrong, and finally John James Cronin is younger brother Bobby who seems to have been plucked out of a 50’s sitcom and feels a bit out of place for such a movie.

The whole premise of the movie is that we, the audience, don’t know what the fuck is going on beyond the bathroom door, but some gnarly crazy shit is happening there that we’re never made privy of. The element of the unknown is what keeps the film going, and as we’re bombarded by flashbacks of Mel and girlfriend Amy casting several incantations (and in horror movies, this is code for, shit is going to get bad real fast) we have to try to stitch the pieces together and try to understand what the hell is happening.

The movie’s strength is in the characters and the setting. The only time you’re taken a bit out of the story is when the director rely on special effects that probably due to budgeting issues, aren’t as effective as they should be. The film’s climax (as well as the novella’s climax) is the chilliest scene you’ve seen in awhile. Not to mention, if you’re a rockfan, you’ll readily recognize Ozzy’s voice (and it’s used for the best purpose ever). But overall it’s an enjoyable, dark ride, and I would recommend for you to check it out if you’re a fan of confinement horror, and highly suggest you read the novella the film is based on because it seriously delivers on the chills.

You can now stream on demand on most major streaming services.

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Film Review: Fear Street 1994 & 1978

Growing up I was a HUGE fan of R.L. Stine’s books, in particular the Fear Street series. Basically, those books were my crack and I bought at least three books a month. So when Netflix announced that they were gonna come out with three Fear Street inspired films, I knew that I was going to check it out.

From the very beginning 1994 opens with a very Scream-esque sequence – a recognizable actress is first chased and then stabbed to death by a guy dressed in a black cloak and skull mask. I didn’t mind the heavy handed reference because the inside of a mall after hours was definitely creepy. However, I was soon annoyed by the following scene where the protagonist is listening to the radio and Garbage’s “Only Happy When It Rains” in 1994, when the song came out in September of 1995. That aside, the film’s soundtrack was completely awesome if you’re a lover of 90’s music.

I loved the look of the movie and feeling like I was reliving my high school days, but what didn’t work for me was the fact it simply had too much going on. What I mean is, you have killers, ghosts, and zombies. ALL AT ONCE. It’s just too over the top.

Meanwhile, 1978 was very reminiscent of Friday the 13th franchise with the setting of a summer camp and a possessed killer that wields an ax and wears a burlap sack as a mask (which if you’re a fan of Jason Vorhees you know that he used to wear that as a mask long before he donned a hockey mask). Just like 1994, 1978 had a killer soundtrack (lots of Bowie, and lots of Bowie references, my heart was full). But what made this film superior to 1994 was that it had better fleshed out characters, and I was more invested in these characters than I was in the previous film. Not to mention that this installment mostly focused on ONE possessed killer rather than have a smorgasbord of all things spooky.

FEAR STREET PART 2: 1978 – Cr: Netflix © 2021

I’m really looking forward to the third and final film, 1666. I truly hope that the film is based off of R.L. Stine’s origin saga, The Betrayal, The Secret, and The Burning because those books were truly top notch for MG and it really explained by Fear Street became so cursed (I’m looking at you Goode!).

Let me know if you’ve checked these films out or any of the books when you were young! I’d love to talk more about all things Fear Street!

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Film Review: The Dark & the Wicked

Being cooped up at a home with no signs of theatres opening up, I’ve had to rely on streaming services to watch any new movies that I would’ve watched on the silverscreen. That being said, this film kept coming up time and time again as being the creepiest horror of 2020, so of course I had to see if that statement were true.

The Dark and the Wicked starts out with a feeling of dread, and that feeling never subsides, it actually continues to escalate to a horrifying crescendo. The beginning scenes have the mother chopping up a bunch of veggies with a cleaver, and if you’ve ever feared that using a cleaver in a horror means you’ll end up losing some digits, well this film delivers on that fear in spades.

The premise of the movie is quite simple, two estranged siblings return home when they find out their father is on his death bed. The mother keeps telling them to leave, and the siblings feeling guilty for having pretty much abandoned their parents, don’t leave, not seeing her request as the warning it truly is. A strange nefarious entity has been plaguing their home and their parents, but the brother and sister don’t acknowledge its existence until it’s too late.

This movie delivered on the creepy atmosphere and jump scares, but if you’re looking for answers, you won’t receive any. We never know why the parents were targeted, except for a tiny hint where the father’s caretaker tells the sister that love is how you keep evil away alluding that evil managed to take hold of their parents because they lacked their children’s love. But you never learn how the siblings could redeem themselves and rid themselves of this evil, because this film offers no such comfort. Basically everyone is doomed from the very beginning.

It doesn’t bother me that the film didn’t have a neat little resolution, because some things can’t be undone.

Check this one out if you love creepy, visceral horror.

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